“One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.”
― Virginia Woolf
Defining moments can be poignant. They can be inspiring. They can drag your mood down into the gutter. But they’re important, all the same. It’s those defining moments that will influence what kind of life you choose to live, what art you’ll make, what book you’ll write. Who you’ll fall in love with, and why.
Every life is a series of defining moments. Moments that shape and change us and have a huge impact on our development and our choices. They aren’t easy to recognise when you’re experiencing them. I wish they were. When you’re living through these moments, they feel like another blur in a series of blurs that fly by hardly marked or commemorated.
But as you look back, through the lens of hindsight, it’s easier to see the small twists and turns that shaped everything that you were, and are, and will be. Everything that you believe in. Everything that matters to you.
All you can do is let the moments come. Let them happen, let them influence, and try to learn as often as you can. Look back. Look back regularly. Like a ship coming in on the horizon, your defining moments may slowly become visible.
All my love,
Change your self-talk. Have you ever noticed that the way we talk to ourselves matters? We say things to ourselves that we would never say to anyone else. Sometimes we even tell ourselves that we are no good or that we are a failure. We call this “self-talk.” Talk to yourself the way you would talk to your best friend. Change your self-talk. Transform your life.
There are a lot of people out there who feel lonely and isolated. The world can seem like a big, scary place. It can be easy to feel like you’re all alone. I’ve felt that way before. And I know it’s not an uncommon feeling. But there are ways to combat loneliness and isolation. One of them is to join a group and share your thoughts with others. It’s a lot easier to feel connected to something when you’re actually part of it..
Your past is a part of you. It is not the whole of you. Too often, we focus on the past and what we’ve lost. But when we do, we miss all the good things that have come our way. Don’t let your past define who you are. Instead, recognise that it has shaped you. And most importantly, don’t let it stop you from letting other good things come into your life.
Read: The Technology of Kindness
“People’s ability to connect is the glue that holds our culture together. By thinning out our interactions and splintering our media landscape, the Internet has taken away the common ground we need to understand one another. Each of us is becoming more confident about our own world just as it drifts farther from the worlds of others. Empathy requires us to understand that even people who disagree with us have a lived experience as deep as our own. But in the fractured landscape of social media, we have little choice but to see the other side as obtuse, dishonest or both. Unless we reverse this trend and revive empathy, we have little chance of mending the tears in our social fabric.”