#223 / You have come so far, my dear.

“Maybe you don’t need to choose someone. Maybe you don’t need to carve out space to love someone. But I swear to you, that you have to choose and love yourself.”

black and gray bed comforter near clear glass window

I believe in celebrating progress, and celebrating wins - because no matter how small and inconsequential they may feel in the giant, towering shadows of the universe, I think there’s beauty in every step forward. We’re often under so much pressure to achieve, to push and to be and do more, with no break and no breath in between and Godess forbid we should ever pause! It becomes so much, that we can’t even take a moment to recognise when we have done something wonderful.

Something like standing up for ourselves.

Something like making our beds.

Something like reaching out and just holding someone’s hand.

Something like surviving another day.

I believe that you’ve come so far my dear. I know you have, because I know I have, and I know the trials and pains of the world around us, and I know what it takes to get here, in one piece. It takes guts, blood, sweat and tears. It takes a stubbornness of willpower that refuses to let go, even when things feel like they have reached their darkest. It takes something that is innately you, and something that is innately me, and we do get to be proud of that. We do.

Take a look back this week, at the path behind you. Take a look back and consider how many steps you’ve had to tread to be here now. Take a look and be proud because you have no idea how proud the rest of us are of you in return.

I’ve realised lately that I’ve been tired for about 5 years now. Tired and aching and hurting a little, and it’s been rough. I’m directionally okay with that, because I know I’m working on it, and even in the thick of that story of exhaustion and burnout, I know I’m proud of the little progress I’ve made.

There’s something precious in that for all of us. Trust me.

All my love,



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Go walking. Go hiking. Get out into nature and don’t look at your phone. Be in the fresh air, be in the clear space, and keep putting one foot ahead of the other. We didn’t evolve to this point in our development as human beings to be couch-bound with Twitter in our hands. Walk it out.


Take a moment this week to sit still, too. Sit in silence. Sit in contemplation. Sit with your head in your hands if you need to, but sit. There doesn’t always need to be motion and noise. They have their place. But you need a place too. A place where the dust is allowed to settle, and you’re allowed to settle with it.


Plant your flag. Think about what you’re going to boldly believe, dedicate yourself to and stand by. It could be something huge, it could be something tiny, and it will have a tremendous amount of worth and value either way. I am planting my flag in the belief that I am healthy, safe and okay on my own. How about you?

For Your Spellbook Journal


Write about joy this week. When was the last time you truly felt joy? When was the last time you could recognise it and celebrate it and bask in it? What created that joy? How can you create it again?