“Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.”
― Nora Ephron
We’re all frightened of running out of time. Time to say that one truth, to do that one thing that truly matters, to be who we want to be. I don’t know when it is exactly that we gain the terrible gift of understanding our mortality, but it happens at some point in our childhood and it shapes our scarcity mindset.
In spite of this, we have assigned a certain degree of shame to changing course, to changing our lives, and to searching for a new direction. We’ve made it seem as though shifting gears is evidence that we’ve been wrong and ought to be embarrassed by it. Even though we all find that creeping panic entirely relatable, we seem to have a shared intention of keeping each other on a singular path, rather than endorsing exploration and experimentation.
But it’s never too late to change course. Never. It’s never too late to look at the person you are, and measure yourself against the person you want to be, and re-calibrate. It’s never too late to find a new passion and a new path. It’s never too late to admit that you’ve been a struggling asshole and you don’t want to be that for a moment longer.
All my love,
I believe it’s a rather healthy thing to stay in touch with our former selves. To spend a little time with the ghosts of who we used to be. Joan Didion thought so, too. It goes with the name. For the next few days, try and spend a few moments meditating on the differences between you last year, last month, last week and you today.
Aim for a touch of comfort in your food this week. It doesn’t have to be unhealthy, but a little comfort will do you good. I know that I talk about this a lot. But that’s because I think you need someone in your life who will tell you to eat and enjoy yourself, instead of telling you to be ashamed of your body and what it needs.
If you have a secret that you’ve been keeping inside - it might be time to share it. Share it with just one person, and let it out of the vault. Are you in love? Are you scared? Are you hurting? Tell someone. I know I’m going to. Let’s be brave together?
For Your Spellbook Journal
Give yourself a page in your journal to write on sentence imagining who you’ll be in five years’ time. And give yourself a few moments after it to enjoy that picture. You’ll get there my darling. You’ll get there.