#237 / Give and take space

Tuesday Edition

“How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.”― Rupi Kaur


photo of forest trees

Giving and taking space is one of the hardest parts of any relationship, whether it’s with your friends, your family, your loved ones, your work colleagues or anyone else. There is a belief, in our culture, that taking space from someone is a bad thing, that it means that you love them less, you aren’t there for them, or they aren’t there for you. But taking space doesn’t mean you’re avoiding someone. It means you’re recharging and getting yourself into a better place.

I think true love is able to blossom when two people can step away from each other without turning it into a war. There’s nothing wrong with having a bit of margin from the people you care about; in that margin, you’re both able to grow as individuals, on a human level, to come back stronger together.

We lose sight of that - I believe - because we think about our relationships in terms of unions. Rather than seeing ourselves as two separate people who care for each other, we see ourselves as playing parts in a unit, complimenting each other through incompletion. But if you can reach for the strength of yourself and yourself alone, and understand the space that you need to inhabit to be there, I think you stand a stronger chance of a stronger relationship.

All my love,

Joan

💖


You received this email because you subscribed to Tiny Spells, a twice-weekly email containing the self-care tips and prompts you need to better look after your most precious responsibility - you.

🔮 Support Tiny Spells (Buy me a coffee)


🍓

If you can get to the store, pick up some fresh fruit and enjoy it today. A few strawberries with a quiet cup of tea might do you a while world of good my love. 


🧵

We have a culture of waste. That’s the defining feature that we all share. We buy the new and discard the old, without a thought or any hesitation. Today, I want us to just find something broken and try to fix it. Mend that damn sock. Fix that stitch. And do it for what it represents - an acceptance that broken things like us need not be thrown away...


 🕯

Can you light a candle today, and just sit with it? I’m not asking you to try and meditate or reach inner peace, or any of the things the influencers say. I just want you to sit still and give yourself a moment to wind down without pressure. 


For Your Spellbook Journal

✍️

Write down your intention for the week ahead. What do you want to feel, do? Who do you want to be?