#261 / Your needs are f**king important

Tuesday Edition

“Your heart knows its own way. Stop looking for a better GPS.”

Your needs are important. You can’t hide them, or hide from them. Suppressing them is not the solution, and if you want to deny your own needs in order to fit into a square hole - nothing good will come of it.

It could be space. Quiet. Distance. Communication. Hugs and hand holding. Quality time. Time away. Whatever you need, to be your best self and give your relationships their best chance at success, those needs are valid. Don’t shut them away.

I think there’s a tendency, for good people, to prioritise someone else, anyone else, above ourselves. Even to take responsibility for someone else, before we take responsibility for ourselves. But we matter. We truly matter.

Full disclosure - I’ve never been good at this. Please work on it with me? I could use the encouragement too!

All my love,




Your feelings aren’t toxic. Sharing them doesn’t make you toxic. You’re not an island, and you’re not a robot, and nobody wants you to be. If you let yourself feel what you feel, and you honestly try to express and understand them, you don’t need to be afraid of your own emotions.


This week, try to take stock of your belongings, just a little. Everything piles up over Christmas. New underwear, oven mitts and piles of - let’s be honest - crap. Box some of it up, store it away and clear the clutter. You’ll be grateful for the space.


The season is full of stress, heart ache and pressure. Folks are pressured and exhausted by their families their commitments and the inner need to make the break count, at any cost. We could all use a kind word. Maybe this week is the right time to put down a few lines in a note to your loved ones, and tell them that you give a s**t when the wrapping paper has been put away.